The Four Ghosts of the White House

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The Four Ghosts of the White House

One night, George W. Bush is tossing restlessly in his White House bed. He awakens to see George Washington standing by him Bush asks him, 'George, what''s the best thing I can do to help the country?'
'Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did,' Washington advises, and then fades away...

The next night, Bush is astir again, and sees the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moving through the darkened bedroom. Bush calls out, 'Tom, please! What is the best thing I can do to help the country?'
'Respect the Constitution, as I did,' Jefferson advises, and dims from sight...

The third night sleep still does not come for Bush. He awakens to see the ghost of FDR hovering over his bed. Bush whispers, 'Franklin, What is the best thing I can do to help the country?'
'Help the less fortunate, just as I did,' FDR replies and fades into the mist...

Bush isn''t sleeping well the fourth night when he sees another figure moving in the shadows. It is the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. Bush pleads, 'Abe, what is the best thing I can do right now to help the country?'
Lincoln replies, 'Go see a play.' "

THE SENILITY PRAYER

I don't know where this originally came from. It was sent to me by a friend with some other "senior" jokes.

THE SENILITY PRAYER: Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.